Only feel the sweet stuffs.

Suppose to meet JD for sakae but changed of plans because last minute work stuffs. Anyway, work was fun playing with the kids.....

So, JD and Momma Ng had me over for dinner after work. I'll be frank, felt like home that is. Totally at ease, Momma Ng is friendly and reminds me of my Ahma. Anywaysss, dinner was great, lotus soup and prawnssss me favourite! And msJD help me with the prawnsss tooo. Not that I dont know how to, lazy you seeee. So! monopoly deck gamezzz thing they bought and I won having the most property and cashhh. Better if its real cashy.

And there comes the guessing guessing, cakeSSS and the ICECREAM (which Ive been wanting to have because the museum had this retro lion stick icecream! but none was for me wtf). So I love (to max) my first bday gifts for being twenty and alive. Its the TRANSFORMERS TWINSSS, the bucky tooth one you know??? I merely anyhow mentioned and JD rmbed to anyhow tell msJD and msJD rmbed and so I have bucky twinsss with me now. The cakeSSS is really cute. And the icecream, needless to say right? So all the sweet stuffs is overwhelming, I am having diabetics soon, NOT!

Really thanks for having me over, homely suits me fineee. I really like Momma Ng. My mom also Momma Ng. Hmmmzxzxxsx. OKaye, I had a long day and a crappy happy sweet post so i shall now deserve sweet dreamszzz to end my day.

PS: Photos upload asap JD please send me. Next, I m going to buy lion stick ice cream, retro right?

Mood: SWEE LA!

Stay close despite distance.

I begin with a sigh. I miss Sun ting and Shu nan alot, especially tonight. I refused to click on their msn since Ive nothing in common to chat. So tonight I began clicking and chatting. Over a short period of four months, the two buddies got separated. Shu nan decided to further her studies in England. Such courage, can i have?

Think of the people left behind, think of the roads ahead still long. Alone distanced from everyone you know, except the blog you can surrender your thoughts to. I, too shall practise independent (someday thou).

Is living life to fullest my goal or be together with my family more important. Perhaps, being with my family is living life to fullest. Thoughts, they can be so contradicting. Still, seeing my dad pout makes my day. :)

Love is great.

Been slicing wood lately. Shaky hands and sore feets. Little sleep, students complaint and parents unhappy about the big scale model. Stay overnight in studio and my dad realised how much i cant cope with everything, he agreed to help out. (note: he used to say your work you need to learn how to do yourself, yet he agreed readily this time round)

He brought me to find the parts and asked his friend for help when parts could not be found. Then back to school to finish up whatever we could. The nails were too long and he went home to cut the nails for me. 32 nails in all and he hand cutted everything. He got mom to step his back when his done. Old and aching makes me heartache too.

Mom so all the cooking, Dad do all the odd jobs. Me do all the appreciating. Love is great, stay lovely Hua pa and Hua ma.

Relax breathe relax breathe.

Do you know that i've been up since ten? very early for a saturday. I need to buck up and stop feeling so stress. RELAXZXXX . . .

Knew a few new friends, sounds like fun people trying to entertain each other throughout the people-less show. Yan came to fetch me out of convenient. Followed him back to his mom bubble shop. seems like fun too mixing the powders and syrups. me also wanna open one shop. Followed him to hopsital to visit grandpa. Ah gong super cute when he talks. he can speak 6 o clock in english. salute :D then meet the latehs for supper. Me like to talk to Yan mama. very interesting talking about fortune reading. me gna strike gold apparently.

Aim of the day:
-finsh the construction dwgs planning and making sure it's gna work;
-finish up 3D modeling.

Aim before monday:
finish intech ex one to five/six.

listen to me grind, oh whine i mean.

Okaye here i go again. i feel very vexed. mostly with myself. i know what to do then i think too much i dont really know how to do. if i didnt think too much then i'll think so simple how can must complicated abit. i noted something i want to write in journal but do not know how to present it so i ended up just taking note and not doing anything about it. so it seems like i done alot of work but actually no. the above is about school.

at home i am vexed mostly because i miss my grandma who is in Batam for the last few days. so i was thinking and worrying about her safety. so when she came over my place today i was feeling kind of sian. mostly because i need some peace to sort out my thinkings and do some planning but her arrival will means non stop hits. when she offered to help me carry some nutc stuffs i told her no need la i can take. i feel so bad and cruel. how can i tell her off in such manner? i mean grandma leh not some bitchybimbos. then i wanted to apologise but couldnt bring myself to spell sorry to her. i wanted to cherish her and i know i do. but i cant seems to continuously shower her love because often than not, i get frustrated talking to her. she repeated x5 times and huhs alot. when i am in good mood mostly i laugh with her. when i am like today pissed and turn off i pull long faces.

can you understand or have you thought about the stuffs i mentioned? i cannot fathom what exactly is wrong with me. i cant seems to continously be nice to someone, especially my family. i grew sick trying to understand and give in. i grew sick of people not understanding me. i grew sick of people forgetting me. i grew sick of the lifestyle i am in. i grew sad when i know all this.

i grow sadder when i realise the world is not as beautiful as painted. i want to listen to people talk instead of talking because i do not know what to say. i am afraid of know new people too i dont know why. but i know i am wasting my time typing out all these unkempt thoughts of mine here because i ought to practise some self discipline doing 3D instead of debating with myself the pros and cons of doing it. fuck.

at the end of the day mom treat me ice cream to cheer me up when i told her school stuffs. stress. i haven been meeting my friends because i've been trying hard to save up. obviously this isnt doing me any good to my other self.